There’s Gotta Be…

A better way.

When I first started wanting to write this blog I was searching for names there were many things I wanted to say, much of it was around statements like these:

There's Gotta Be a Better Way

There’s gotta be…a better way.
There’s gotta be…more to life.
There’s gotta be…a reason this is happening. 
There’s gotta be…a solution.
There’s gotta be…an answer. 

I’ve always believed that by taking the time to sit and think and write that the ideas would come, that the answers would appear and that I could figure it out. Sometimes the “Gotta Be’s” come from frustration, sometimes they come from hope, but they always come because something in my life just is not working the way I want it to.

So, the name of this blog was almost TheresGottaBe. (There’s gotta be…a great name for my blog?) As you know it ended up being, which is a perfect name for what I want to share here.

Let me share a few ways that you (and me too!) can answer the questions our Gotta Be’s pose.

First of all, you need to know that all problems do have a solution. Some are easy, some incredibly difficult, but when you are faced with wanting to make a change or at least to understand, know that there is an answer. And I also want you to know that most of the time that answer is already inside if you. You just gotta get it out.

4 Steps to find the answer, the reason, the solution.

Step 1: Sit. Stop. Breathe. Find a place where you can relax. Maybe it’s in the basement or at a park, one of my favorite places is at Starbucks. It’s amazing how just having a cup of coffee and breathing can open up your mind and heart to “hear” and to see. It does not have to be a long period of time, can you give yourself 15 minutes?

Step 2: Write. I’m a yellow pad guy, that’s what I use to help my thinking and sorting. And it also helps to have a nice pen, smooth, easy. (I love the Uni-ball Vision Elite!)

Now, start writing. Get it out on paper. Write out the problem. List all the ways that person is making you crazy. Put down all the things that are in your way. Excuse my term here, but Barf it ALL out! Use a lot of paper, use several pads if you need it. This part isn’t supposed to be pretty or perfect, it’s just for you. The things inside you are the things inside you, don’t be afraid of loosing them.

Step 3: Start with a fresh sheet of paper. At the top put down what you want. I want her to treat me better. I want to find a new job. I want to start my own business. I want to get in better shape. You get the idea, this is about you, what you want. When was the last time you gave yourself permission to really think about what you want? Has it been too long?

Now, ask yourself the questions and write down YOUR answers. This is time for the “What ifs”, looking for the possibilities and solutions.

  • What if [fill in the blank] I had the money, I had the time, if I did leave…etc?
  • Who can help me with this? A friend, a lawyer, God?
  • Is this really important? Sometimes, getting it out and letting it go is the best answer.

Remember good questions bring good answers.


Maybe some of the answers you get are pretty tough, like ending a relationship or getting professional help for an addiction or a problem. Maybe you do need to leave that job. Or maybe now is the time to start living your dreams and start your own business. Maybe today is the day you start getting healthy and go for a walk.

Step 4: Take 1 or 2 of your answers or steps and start today to make the change.

Do something:
Write them a letter.
Outline your business plan.
Make that call.
Ask for help.
Forgive them.
Buy that guitar.

Don’t worry that you got it all right. A small step of action, in the right direction, will bring results. Sometimes the results are huge compared to the action you took. It’s just taking that first step.

And if you’ve still got more steps, to change your life into the life you want it to be, that’s ok. Starbucks will be open tomorrow, you can buy a whole stack of yellow legal pads at Sam’s Club for about 6 bucks and you can Sit. Breathe. Think. And write the next step.

P.S. Those notes that you wrote at the beginning are for you only. Keep them in a private place. Or throw them away. Keep the ones with the solutions and your action plan.

Take away:

Sit. Breathe. Write.
There is an answer.
Begin. A small step can bring big changes. 
It’s your life, live it!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.